Our government

can suck it.

I was kicked off Medicaid after my 6 week check up with Sophia. After all the cancer crap I had to continue having tests done so I applied for a branch of Medicaid called Plan 1st. They told me I would be covered for all my labs, tests, birth control if I chose to use it etc. Well, I had my last cancer screening at the end of Feb and I just got a 400 dollar bill because Medicaid really doesn't cover it. On top of that I get a call from another doctors office today for $70. I explained to her that I have no income, no job and I'm not collecting unemployment anymore so I literally have nothing to give her and she got very testy with me because she wants that money. I immediately flipped the bitch switch and took my tone up a notch and re-explained to her that if I HAD the money I would pay her but I don't-- what does she expect me to do? She said... "even if you pay $5 a week we won't have to have this discussion." I got very testy at this I asked her where am I supposed to get $5 a week when I HAVE NO INCOME. It's not like I'm trying to cheat them out of any money it's the fact that I have no money to pay them!! Ridiculous.

So that was a bad start to my day. I went then to visit a kid I used to babysit as he is in the hospital. He was in an accident that gave him third degree burns on 40% of his body. When I got to the hospital I drove around it in circles literally 7 times because there is so much construction going on. When I finally parked and got to his room they told me he was in therapy and that I had to wait until 1:30... no biggy (my cousin went too) we went and sat in a waiting room. When we went back up his dad came out and said they were still doing therapy and he was having a rough time so we said we would go back another day. Poor T.
I got my car back. Come to find out I had to have a new tire and wheel put on. Great. I need to sell that hunk of junk.

On top of all the money crap I dealt with this morning it made me realize I NEED a job. Heaven forbid there's an emergency and something happens. Trav has some money saved up but I need him to keep saving so we can move and have money if something happens.
I guess I just feel like a deadbeat. I know I'm not but I feel like it a lot lately. I feel like I'm the only one that can't manage to find work (even though I know that's not the case), I beat myself up because I can't pay any bills let alone put gas in my car, I hate having to ask Trav for money because I feel like I should be pulling my own weight. I went to ManPower today and updated all my stuff there. The lady working told me I'll be at the top of the pile but unfortunately even they are low on work for unqualified people.

Fantastic.